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Table of Contents

• Top Eight Strategies For Talking To Your Child About Food Choices
• Frequently Asked Questions
• Key Takeaways

How you talk to your child about food can shape their eating habits for life. Food relationships develop from a young age, and so if you get it right early on, your child will be less at risk of developing negative behaviours towards food. But it can be difficult to know where to start when it comes to talking to your child about healthy eating choices. We’ve put together 8 strategies you can use to help your child build healthy eating habits from a young age and make mealtimes a happy and battle-free part of family life.

Avoid labelling food as “healthy” or “unhealthy”, ‘good’ or ‘bad’

As parents, we often say certain foods, such as apples and broccoli, are “good for you” and other foods, like sweets and desserts, are “bad for you.” According to research, labelling foods in this way can be harmful to children and lead to feelings of guilt or shame for enjoying ‘bad’ foods, and potentially setting up unhealthy eating behaviours later in life.

Tell your child that all foods have a place in a healthy diet, and that there are no “bad” foods or “”good” foods. Instead, talk about how food can fuel the body – for example, tell your child that ‘carrots help your eyes to see better’ and ‘protein helps your muscles grow stronger so you can do better at soccer’. By reframing food in this way, you can foster positive messages about food that help your child develop healthy eating habits.  

Dietitians and other health professionals like to use the words “everyday foods” and “sometimes foods” to describe food to children in a non-judgemental way. Everyday foods are foods your child needs every day to remain healthy – such as lean meats and legumes, wholegrains and cereals, dairy, and fruits and vegetables. Sometimes foods are the foods your child doesn’t need every day – such as chips, sugary drinks, cake, chocolate, or ice-cream.

Teach your child about the different food groups

Teach your child about the five different food groups, which are fruits, vegetables, grains, protein, and dairy, and their role in providing essential nutrients for growth and development. Try to include all five of them at every meal, which will provide your child with a consistent message that each food is important and essential.  

Make your conversations about health, not weight

Children today are exposed to a constant stream of images and messaging about physical appearance and body ideals. Some studies have shown that kids as young as 3 can develop anxieties around body image. When talking to your child about food, make sure to teach them about the importance of nutrition without focusing on weight. Always focus on what food helps the body do instead of how food affects appearance or weight.

Avoid making comments about your child’s weight or body shape. Frequently connecting the idea of food to the idea of weight gain will only make it more likely that your child will become hyper-focused on weight. Studies have shown that in families where parents talk about “weight,” kids have more disordered eating habits, lower self-esteem, more body dissatisfaction, and are more likely to be depressed.  

Do not use food as a reward

Using certain foods as a reward can encourage unhealthy eating habits in children. When certain foods are used as a reward, kids start to associate that food with the positive feelings of success and enjoy eating it more. Using food as a reward encourages children to eat when they’re not hungry to reward themselves. Since the food used as a reward is usually a treat, children who are given food rewards tend to eat more treats when they are older.

Some studies have found an association between the regular use of food rewards and emotional overeating behaviours starting in children from just 5 years of age. Instead of making dessert a treat to be earned, try offering it with a meal. Non-food rewards – such as extra playtime, family activities, or verbal praise – are healthier alternatives to reward good behaviour.

Avoid making certain foods completely off-limits

Making certain foods completely off-limits can often backfire on parents. When you make a food off-limits, you risk making your child more interested in that food – it is known as the “forbidden fruit” effect – and then, they’re likely to overindulge in it whenever they get the chance. 

Instead of limiting foods completely, teaching your child moderation and portion control is the key. By making all foods accessible, you help your child to build a healthy attitude towards eating.

Offer a variety of foods from the 5 food groups

Putting a variety of food on the table and allowing kids to choose for themselves gives them a sense of independence while allowing them to discover what they like. If your child doesn’t like a food initially, don’t give up. Simply take it away and offer it again another time.

According to research, it can take 12 to 17 times to introduce a food to children before they’re even interested in trying it. Introducing different foods and using different recipes can help keep it interesting for kids and will ensure they are meeting all their nutrient needs.

Involve kids in preparing and cooking food

Let your child help with meal planning, food shopping, and even preparing meals. This gives your child a feeling of control. You can teach also teach your child how to read food labels when you are at the grocery store. Children are much more likely to eat healthy foods if they actively choose and prepare them.

Let kids eat when they’re hungry and stop eating when they’re full

Children are born with a built-in biological process that enables them to know when they are full. Try to encourage your child to stop eating when they feel full, rather than asking them to ‘clean their plate’ at each meal. When kids respond to feelings of fullness, they are less likely to overeat and are learning healthy eating habits.

If parents push children to eat when they aren’t hungry, it could teach them to overeat, according to the Mayo Clinic. It is common for children to refuse food, and you should never force them to eat or clear their plates. This allows for children to recognise their own hunger and fullness cues which helps them to build healthy food relationships.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Is using dessert as a reward harmful to my child?

Using dessert as a reward can undermine the healthy eating habits that you are trying to teach your child, as it can unintentionally make certain foods seem more desirable than others. This practice often leads to children overeating foods that are high in sugar, fat, and empty calories, and interferes with their natural ability to regulate their eating.

Studies have found that using dessert or sweets as a reward could unintentionally teach a child to rely on food to deal with their emotions. Research has also shown that food reward systems can over time lead to such anxiety and guilt around food, that children can go on to develop disordered eating behaviours or eating disorders. Instead, try serving dessert occasionally instead of using it as a reward for good behaviour. Use activities, a trip to the playground, extra screen-time, or one-on-one time to praise good behaviour instead of food. 

Q: What should I say if my child only wants to eat junk food?

Teach your child about the importance of a balanced diet and explain the negative effects of eating too much junk food. Help your child to understand the nutritional value of whole foods and the consequences of eating a lot of processed foods. Instead of completely saying no to junk food though, offer it as an occasional treat rather than a regular meal option. Set clear rules about how often your child can have it, such as once a week, or just for special occasions.

Q:What if my child is a very picky eater?

Many children go through phases of fussy eating; it is very common in young children, but it can occur at any time. It is very often a child’s way of exerting their independence and is a normal part of growing up. For the majority of children, this phase will pass however and cause no harm to their health.

If you child is a picky eater, keep offering new foods repeatedly. Many children are naturally nervous of new things, and it may take lots of attempts before your child starts to like the taste. If your child refuses a new food, do not force them to eat it. Just take the food away without making a fuss. Gradually introduce other foods and keep going back to the foods your child did not like before.

Give small portions and praise your child for eating, even if they only eat a little. If picky eating becomes extreme – such as avoiding entire food groups, causing weight loss, nutritional concerns, or severe anxiety around eating – it may help to speak to a paediatrician or dietician for additional guidance and support.

Q: Should I talk to my child about weight?

Many parents worry about talking to their child about weight as they are afraid, they might develop an unhealthy relationship with food. Experts recommend that parents should not bring up the issue of body weight with children unless they raise it themselves.

When talking about weight, it is important that you keep the focus on health. You don’t need to use the word “weight”. Instead talk about healthy habits and healthy lifestyles; for example, “eating colourful foods and playing outside helps our bodies feel strong and energetic” instead of “we need to watch your weight”.

Q: What are the signs a child may be developing an unhealthy relationship with food?

If a child is developing an unhealthy relationship with food, they may show one or more of the following warning signs:

• Anxiety around eating
• Secretive eating
• Eating very little food
• Obsession with calories or weight
• Avoiding social meals
• Frequent negative body talk

If you are concerned your child may be developing an unhealthy relationship with food, consult a paediatrician or dietician for additional support and advice.

Key Takeaways

• There are no ‘bad’ foods and ‘good’ foods
• Teach your child about the different food groups
• Make your conversations about health, not weight
• Don’t use food as a reward for good behaviour
• Avoid making certain foods completely off-limits
• Expose your child to a wide variety of healthy foods without pressure
• Involve your child in meal planning and preparation
• Let your child decide when they are full

Legal Disclaimer

This blog post is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical, nutritional, or psychological advice. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals regarding your child’s health, diet, or wellbeing.

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If you suspect your child has a medical condition or eating disorder, seek professional guidance promptly. Use of this blog is at your own risk, and Nextcare is not liable for any outcomes related to its use.